Monday, January 31, 2011

Just How Stupid Do They Think I Am???

I recieved the following email today.  I have added comments which will be red and italics for clarity. Just how stupid do they think I am???

Dear Sir/Madam,


This is to officially inform you that we have verified your contract file presently on my desk, which I never sent and I found out that you have not received your payment due to your lack of co-operation and not fulfilling the obligations giving to you giving? in respect to your contract payment.Secondly, you are hereby advised to stop dealing with some non-officials in the bank as this is an illegal act and will have to stop if you so wish to receive your payment immediately. Non-officials that somehow work in the bank, but are illegal. Oh, Yeah. I see that all the time!

After the Board of director's meeting held in Abuja where???, we have resolved in finding a solution to your problem FANTASTIC grammar!. We have arranged your payment through our SWIFT CARD PAYMENT CENTRE in Europe, America, Africa and Asia Pacific which one?; this is part of the mandate passed by the Senate who's senate? You are in Nigeria for crying out loud! in respect to overseas contract payment and debt re-scheduling. And also the  Nigerian Government is using this means to reward all the citizens of the United sStates and all part of Europe all part of Europe. Not some parts, ALL PART including Asia, Australia, South America, Canada, Antarctica e.t.c Australia, South America, Canada and Antarctica are now part of Europe?! and all those who have lost their funds in either scam ie: this email, or an uncompleted business, or otherwise, I just love the incorrect punctuation. Proof positive that this is a legitimate email.  You should know that if you are interested to receive your ATM card which will be credited with $5,000,000.00 uUnited sStates dollars before it is being sent to you direct to your doorstep through the FedEx courier service, you will have to respond to me with your full information’s not information, but apparently something BELONGING to that information., After your response you will be directed to the FedEx shipping courier representative!
 tive whose name is Mr. Edward Edwa sweet name, huh?

He will send you your ATM CARD which you will use to withdraw your money via ATM MACHINE in any part of the world, and the maximum daily limit is Fifteen Thousand United States dollars ($15,000.00) only. And also note that the Nigerian Government has taken care of the shipping fee of your ATM card, so if Mr. Edward is requesting for grammar, dang it! another shipping fee, you will have to report him to me immediately. When you receive your ATM card, you have to alert me so that we can give you process of how to activate and make use of your ATM CARD.

If you like to receive your fund this way, kindly contact me with the following information’s um... nevermind. below.

(1) Your Full Name  Mr. Edward Edwa
(2) Full residential address Quebec, Europe (apparently)
(3) Phone and Fax Number 1-800-2 SCAM ME
(4) Occupation. Con Artist (and poor one at that)
(5) Personal Identification. Driver’s license or International Passport. In your freaking dreams
(7) Age Old enough to know better
(8) Marital Status Nunya biz
(9) Sex No thanks. Your lack of intellegence turned me off.

This message is supported by the Nigerian Government. And I thought OUR government had problems

Thanks for your co-operation. Yeah, whatever.


Mr. Olusegun Olutoyin Aganga
Minister, Federal Ministry of Finance


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